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“Then one day Princess Marissa was on her way back to the castle
when she was attacked by a pack of gypsies. They tore her beautiful purple
dress right off her and ran away, leaving her with nothing to cover herself.
Princess Marissa was so upset, but she did not shed a tear. She was so ashamed
and embarrassed, but she told no one . . . (The Tearless Princess, by
Anonymous, used by permission).
The words taken from this story were written by an adult survivor
friend to describe her molestation. This creative exercise was a powerful tool
that has aided her in her healing process. She chose to express her pain in the
language of a children’s book. It helped her remember. It gave her a voice.
Nothing can silence a human being like shame. Nothing can elicit
such deep personal humiliation like childhood sexual abuse.
My friend concludes this paragraph in her story with these sad
words, “The princess went on with her life as if nothing had happened, but a
piece of her soft heart became hard like stone.”
So this week, I once again have my “what if” questions: What if
her parents had taught her about sexual abuse? What if they had built a
bridge of communication with their daughter regarding abuse so that she could
possibly cross over and tell them what had happened? What if she had known that
she could trust them with her shame?
Once again we will never know the answers to my questions. Sexual
abuse is a complicated issue. But wouldn’t it be comforting, to know
as parents, that at least we tried?
Let’s begin
the conversation about childhood sexual abuse with our children. So they will
know. So they can tell.
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