It's never too late to begin the healing process from childhood sexual abuse. It's never too early to fall in love with the person God created you to be. Long ago someone made a choice to take away your innocence, but today that someone can't touch your freedom to heal.

Friday, February 24, 2012

Abuse or Experimentation?

It had been years since they had spent time together, and the weekend was nearly over. The twins and their spouses sat by the fireplace in the rustic cabin, sipped coffee, and reminisced of years gone by. Childhood tales flowed with ease regarding the siblings’ near misses and alliances made—stories their parents didn’t know then and don’t know now.

“It feels so good to laugh,” Meagan said soothing her stomach muscles with her hand.

Michael grinned, “Memories, gotta love’em and boy did we make some good ones, Sis.”

“We sure did,” she said.

Meagan’s husband stood, stretched, and yawned. “Well folks, I’m going to call it a night. We’ve got a long drive tomorrow. Back to work. Back to reality.”  He leaned in and gave Meagan a quick kiss on the cheek.

“I’m heading to bed too,” said Michael’s wife as she gathered the coffee cups. “The kiddos are going to be wound-up after spending the weekend with my parents. And besides, at forty, I need all the beauty-sleep I can get.”

“You don’t need any beauty sleep for me,” said Michael giving a quick wink. “I’ll be joining you in a few.”

The siblings sat alone, their faces illuminated by the glow of the fire, both lost in thought as they stared into the flames. They had spoken so many words, yet for Meagan there were more words she needed to say. Yet, she didn’t know how to say them. What if he doesn’t remember? I hate to ruin the weekend. It’s been great. But I have too. A spark from the fire snapped.

“Michael,” she said, eyes still focused on the flames. “Do you remember when we were young and—”

“I do,” he said, never taking his eyes off the fire.

“That was really stupid," she said. "Wasn’t it?”

“Yeah, it was. I don’t know what we we’re thinking. I guess we were just two kids, two curious kids.”

“Yeah, curious and ignorant,” said Meagan. “It’s not like we had a clue what we were doing. I mean, Mom and Dad never talked to us about anything.”

“No, they certainly didn’t.” Michael looked at Meagan. “I’m sorry, Sis.”

“Thanks,” Meagan said, turning toward Michael, her eyes glistening in the firelight. “I’m sorry, too.”


Sibling sexual experimentation is not considered sexual abuse when the siblings are near the same age and there is no power play or coercion involved. It happens sometimes. And it’s nobody’s fault.


  1. My spouse has struggled with the guilt and shame of sibling "experimentation". Thank you for addressing this topic! I'm sure my spouse will appreciate a new perspective on it!

  2. I pray that he will. Thank you for sharing.


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