It's never too late to begin the healing process from childhood sexual abuse. It's never too early to fall in love with the person God created you to be. Long ago someone made a choice to take away your innocence, but today that someone can't touch your freedom to heal.

Thursday, December 20, 2012

When a Father Speaks

“If you really want your kids to hear something, they need to hear it from their dads,” the culture watcher man said on the CD. “They expect to hear words of instruction from their mothers.”
I drove down the highway, tears streamed down my face.

“But they don’t have a dad, God,” I said, as my words bounced around my empty mini-van. I was making the drive home, New York to Pennsylvania. I had just returned three little sisters to their grandmother’s house. And I felt a heavy burden for them and for their future—a fatherless future.

Little did I know that years later, these three little girls would become our daughters. And they would have a father.

I don’t remember why the man on the CD said kids hear instruction from their dads better than their moms. Perhaps it’s because historically mothers not only did much of the childcare, they gave much of the instruction. Perhaps it’s because women are more verbal then men. Kids are used to moms warning about this and teaching about that, so a momma’s instruction becomes more muddled, a bit like Charlie Brown’s teacher, “Whomp, wahaw whomp, wahaw whomp . . ."

Whatever the reason, when a dad speaks, there is power in his words. It’s why I have the father in my children’s book, Rise and Shine: A Tool for the Prevention ofChildhood Sexual Abuse, give the instruction to his daughter about sexual violations.

I believe in daddies and in the power of fatherhood. I believe that when fathers understand that they can play a major role in protecting their kids, and given the encouragement and tools that they need, they will have the conversations. They will do what they must do.

I believe in motherhood. I know that mommas, now and in the future, will continue to warn and teach, even if they sound like Charlie Brown’s teacher. They will also, given the encouragement and tools they need, talk to their kids about sexual abuse. They will do what they must do.

And blessed is the child who has two parents working together to protect them, doing what they must do.

To watch the free children's video, Rise And Shine: A Tool for the Prevention of Childhood Sexual Abuse, please visit: RiseAndShineMovement.orgProtecting children, one conversation at time.


  1. Thanking the Lord for the strong and compassionate earthly father who SO modeled our Heavenly Father. Thankfully God also uses flawed fathers, most especially when there is humility and tenderness along with the flaws. Appreciating your observations and guidance, Carolyn.

  2. I don't think fathers receive enough credit or encouragement in our society. Doing what I can. Thank you for your comments. I truly appreciate them. :)


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